Beyond Crisis
by kettle and pot
Summary: Life goal: take down ShinRa and not die in the process. Too bad that was harder than it sounded. SI-OC.
1. alistair

welcome to beyond crisis! i got a plot bunny and had to write this down. it just sorta... came, ya know? i had a lot of fun with it, though

warning: liberal headcanons in use. i'll try my best to explain each one when they come up, but ffvii is a big game that doesn't bother to explain most of its mechanics. like the lack of a world government, or how mako can both beef you up and also be a substitute for electricity

* * *

"Do I know Zackary Fair?" I looked up to the man's smiling face and wondered if he was obfuscating stupidity or if he really was as stupid as he looked. "This is a town with 300 people."

His lips twitched. "So you know him?"

I stood up and brushed off my pants, abandoning the sketch I'd been drawing on the dirt. As I glanced around, I noticed that the town square was empty. Probably because the rest of the village was smart enough to evacuate sooner.

"Who wants to know?" I asked, stuffing my hands into my pockets. I pretended I didn't see the soldiers carrying guns behind him.

The man hesitated. He had dark hair, slicked back into a mullet, and his jaw was covered in a layer of uneven stubble. Young, but not too young; handsome, but not too handsome. He wore a ShinRa issued suit, with the familiar logo printed clearly on the left breast pocket.

When I continued to stare at him, he shifted from foot to foot, his fond expression melting to discomfort. "My name is Reeve Tuesti," he said. "I'm work as a manager for—

"—ShinRa, I know," I finished. "What else?"

Reeve blinked. "Um. Okay." He rummaged through his satchel and retrieving a manila folder, which he held out to me. I looked at him, then back at him.

"You want me to read this?"

"Well, no. Not you, specifically."

I barely suppressed a frown. So he _was _an idiot. "What do you want with Zack?" I demanded, crossing my arms. "I have a right to know."

Reeve tossed a glance behind him, and the head soldier gave an almost imperceptible nod of his head. He turned back around. "I've been in correspondence with him for a while now. He emailed me a few months ago about alternative energy sources and raised some issues about artificial poverty in Midgar slums, and I..." He paused. "Aren't you seven?"

"Eight," I corrected.

"Okay," Reeve said. "Well, anyways, I was curious about how someone in a rather isolated village—" "How'd you know he was from Gongaga?" "—I traced his IP address to a remote location between Gold Saucer and Gongaga, and it wasn't hard to guess that only a Gongagan would need to exit their hometown to get Internet reception—would know so much about Midgar slums. Also, he raised some interesting points about the effect of corporate monopoly on lower-class citizens, so here I am." He looked at me expectantly. "Does that answer your question?"

"Most of them, anyways," I said. I paused when I noticed his noticeable confusion. "What?"

"Where is everyone?"

Ah. So he finally noticed. "They left."

"Why?"

"Because," I said as the foliage to our right split in two, "they know better than to hang around."

The Grand Horn's roar shook the ground, nearly knocking Reeve off his feet. As the soldiers' panicked shouts rose in volume, I grabbed Reeve by the elbow and pulled his shell-shocked form away from the chaos. "Run!"

-x-

"If everyone else left, why didn't you?" panted Reeve as we sprinted through the jungle.

"I was waiting for you," I called back. I darted to the side and pulled Reeve into a new section of the forest. Here, the green of the foliage was a verdant emerald, and the leaves grew to be as large as my face. Sunlight filtered through the trees to form a dappled pattern on the dirt floor.

"What do you mean?" Reeve asked as we made our way along a well-worn footpath. "Where are we going?"

"Mako reactor. The rest of the townsfolk are there."

His eyes lit up. "You'll introduce me to Zack, then?"

"Sure," I said. Suddenly, he stumbled over a tree root and dragged me down with him. For the first time in years, I lost my footing in the Gongagan jungle and fell to the ground. "Watch your step!"

"Sorry," he gasped. Sweat rolled down his brow and dripped into his grey eyes as he bent over, pressing a hand to his heaving chest. "I am... Wow, I'm really out of shape."

I hopped to my feet and glanced behind us. The leaves on the bushes began to tremble with the sound of a distant roar, and a hint of panic seeped in. "Come on," I hissed, grabbing his arm and dragging him up. "We're almost there."

We hadn't felt any footsteps yet, which meant the Grand Horn was far enough that we could probably reach the mako reactor before it could catch us. I glanced at Reeve as I tugged him along. There was sweat pouring down his face and his breath rasped in his chest. ShinRa nerds. Couldn't run if their lives depended on it (which it did).

I leaped over a fallen tree in our path and helped Reeve crawl over it carefully. _Go, go, go, _I chanted mentally as he gingerly slung one leg over the log, then struggled with the other. A low moan rippled through the forest. I froze in place, my hands digging into Reeve's arm.

"Shit."

"Oh, I _really _need to start working out," panted Reeve as he toppled over onto the dirt. I offered him a hand and he grabbed it, pulling himself up. "Thank you—"

"Duck," I said, and shoved him onto the ground, just as a huge shadow leaped over the log we were climbing over and crushed it to pieces. I hauled Reeve behind a bush before the monster could notice us and hushed it before he could alert the Grand Horn to our presence.

Eyes wide, we watched the Grand Horn toss its head about and sniff the air, snorting loudly. Now that it was no longer charging, its steps seemed slow and cautious, almost hesitant. It smashed its head into an overhanging tree branch and moaned lowly as it fell to splinters at its feet.

The realization hit me like a Thundaga, and my hand shot out to grasp Reeve's forearm.

"It's blind," we said at the same time. Reeve shot me a surprised yet impressed look.

"It's using scent and touch instead of sight to sniff us out," I whispered. "Plus its eyes are dull, completely unlike the mako blue of the other monsters in the area."

"Mako-infused monsters," muttered Reeve, brow furrowing. "But how?"

"We live next to a mako reactor. Even the _plants _are infected."

Reeve pushed himself onto one elbow and peeked over the bush. "But that's exactly it. Mako reactors aren't supposed to affect nearby vegetation. They were designed to keep the mako _within._"

I thought about it. Made sense. It explained why Midgar's residents weren't all sporting glowing blue eyes and super-powered abilities.

But we didn't exactly have time to think about it. The Grand Horn's nostrils flared as it caught our scent amongst the mako, and it swiveled, growling in triumph.

"Run," I hissed. When Reeve didn't move, I grabbed his hand. "Run!"

-x-

We burst through the undergrowth and onto a familiar dirt path, sweaty and exhausted. A figure in the crowd of townspeople near the reactor leaped to her feet and rushed to meet us.

"Al!"

"Hey," I said as I bent over and gasped for breath.

A pair of cool hands grasped my face and pushed aside my damp bangs. "Goddess," Ma breathed, then kissed both of my sweaty cheeks. "I couldn't find you after we evacuated, and I was... Never mind that. What were you doing in the village?"

"Sorry, I got... got distracted." Once I was no longer in danger of coughing my lungs out, I gestured to Reeve, who had collapsed onto the ground and was doing a very good imitation of a writhing fish. "This is Mr. Reeve Tuesti from ShinRa, Ma. Reeve, this is my ma."

Despite his clear exhaustion, Reeve pushed himself onto one elbow and attempted a smile. It was a nice smile, neither mocking like certain ShinRa inspectors, nor greedy like some of the merchants who passed by. Ma seemed to think so as well, because when Reeve offered his hand in a handshake, she didn't flinch or give him a dirty look. "Nice to meet you, Ms...?"

"Oh, you can just call me Grace," she said, helping him to his feet. "I'm sorry you came at such a bad time, Mr. Tuesti. We're used to it, but a Midgardian like you must be taken off guard by Gongaga's wilderness."

"No, it's quite alright. Your son was just... showing me around."

That was a nice way of putting it. Ma gave me a _look _which meant I was getting a tongue lashing later, then turned back to Reeve with a sweet smile on her face. "Well, Al is a very nice boy. Thank you for taking him back to us." She switched to the Gongagan dialect. "Al, if you even _think _of escaping, I will personally find all your books and toss them in the fire to make stew tonight. Do you understand?"

"Yes, ma'am," I muttered, stuffing my hands into my pockets.

"I can't hear you."

"Yes, ma'am," I said louder.

"Good." Ma smiled at Reeve. "Mr. Tuesti, would you like to stay for dinner?"

Reeve suddenly looked nervous. "Oh, no, I couldn't possibly intrude—"

At the same time, I protested, "Ma, that's not necessary—"

"I insist." At this point Ma's smile had stopped being friendly and crossed into the territory of "terrifying." "Grand Horns aren't easy to deal with, and I'm assuming ShinRa won't be able to send any replacement trucks and soldiers for a while now."

Reeve's face whitened. "You mean—?"

"To be perfectly blunt, Mr. Teusti," Ma said, "they're dead. So why don't you stay with Al and me for the time being? I'm sure his da won't mind, right, Todd?"

"Sure, honey," said my da from where he was playing a game of Go Fish with his friends.

"There you go," said Ma. "Now my friend Arca over there can fix you up with a good funeral. He'll even give you a discount. Gongaga may be small, but you'll find that we're very friendly folk." She rubbed my dark hair and made it even messier than it already was. "Right, Al?"

She didn't exactly give me a choice. I grumbled under my breath and nodded my assent. Reeve glanced at me, then back at Ma. "I suppose one day couldn't hurt," he said. "Thank you for your hospitality, ma'am."

"Just Grace is fine," said Ma, chuckling. "It's the least I can do after a local monster killed your friends."

"Oh, they weren't my friends." Reeve smiled wryly.

"Even better." She slapped Reeve's back. "Welcome to Gongaga, Mr. Tuesti. Enjoy your stay."

-x-

Dinner was a Gongagan special: frog stew with a side of local fruit. I found Reeve sitting on the porch afterwards, swirling a cup of brandy in one hand and peering listlessly into the dusk. He didn't hear me until I dropped down and sat on the steps beside him. "You look sad."

Reeve glanced me, then took a sip of brandy. "All those soldiers," he murmured, "dead because I was distracted by my own ambitions." He sighed and dragged a hand through his hair, letting it fall over his eyes. "Goddess, what am I doing here? I should be reporting back to ShinRa, not taking a _vacation _in the middle of nowhere."

I chose not to take offense at that. "Why do you still work for ShinRa?" I asked.

He peaked at me through his bangs. "What do you mean?"

I gave a hapless shrug of my shoulders. "It seems like a shitty organization. Why not quit?"

"ShinRa holds total monopoly over the economy of most of the continent. Hell, it even acts like a de-facto government when it's not sucking up the Planet's resources." Reeve sighed and downed the rest of his brandy. "I just thought..."

"Tell me about your ideas."

Reeve glanced at me in surprise. "You? You're too young for this kind of talk."

I shrugged. "Just pretend that I'm a wall or something. Try it, it might help."

He hesitated only minutely before exhaling, then shifting his weight forward, leaning his chin on his laced fingers. "Midgar is a military nation disguised as a city run by a mega-corporation. On the surface, the different departments are for developing relations with the people and expanding the city. In reality, it's just a euphemism for propaganda."

"There's a difference between a country run by tyrants and a really, really corrupt company holding monopoly over the city's economy, though," I said.

Reeve glanced at me, surprised. "Well, that's true. I guess the difference is... Well, a revolution means total overhaul of an ineffective system. Destroying a monopoly, however, would cause nasty side-effects that might be even worse than the company itself. That's how ShinRa lasted this long, and that's why AVALANCHE can't do anything but infuriate the masses and feed ShinRa's loop of feedback."

A pause where I continued to stare at the ground. Reeve seemed to deflate. "Goddess, saying it out loud is even worse than simply accepting the facts."

"So if you can't do anything to it from the outside, why don't you change it from the inside out?" I asked. "Rework the system. Overthrow the corrupt head executives, or something like that."

"I'm just a manager," Reeve sighed. "I can't kill, can't fight, and I have no executive power. Nothing. I make blueprints and oversee construction, but that's it."

I stared at my hands, then leaned over to grab a stick from the ground. "Sounds like you're giving up," I said.

"Giving up?" He laughed miserably. "Kid, this is me throwing in the towel and admitting my losses before I fall any deeper into the rabbit hole. I can't do anything, not where I am now."

"I thought you'd be the one person who'd never give up." My mouth went dry.

Reeve stared at me. "Kid—"

The stick shrieked as it dragged against the concrete step. "I refuse to believe that things can't change," I said. That was the only thing keep me sane in this stupid world. "You _have _to believe that things can change."

Reeve paused, his voice gentling. "No one cares at ShinRa; not about the economy, and certainly not the people."

"But you came because you cared," I said. "Artificial poverty, corruption—you heard those words and you responded."

"I'm only one man," Reeve said. "I was curious, yes, because we're making the same mistakes as our ancestors, except this time we're draining the Planet's _blood _instead of oil to fuel our greed."

I scratched something on the ground. "Stupid, not to mention dangerous."

"It _is _dangerous. _Mako _is dangerous. That's why most reactors are put in remote villages like Gongaga and Derere, where it's so far from civilization that a mishap would only affect locals, no one else."

I narrowed my eyes at him. Reeve added, "No offense. There's just far less casualties in case of—"

He cut himself off abruptly. I stopped scratching the ground with a stick and turn to look at him. The expression on his face sent a shiver down my spine, and I jolted. "What?"

"The reactor," Reeve said. He leaped to his feet. "The reactor!"

"What?"

"It's leaking— No, malfunctioning— Goddess, we don't have enough time," he hissed.

The words sank in like they were in mud. When they landed, I spat a curse harsh enough to make Reeve wince. "I'll show you the way," I said, jumping up. He hesitated.

"It's going to be dangerous," he said.

"I know."

"We might die."

I laughed. "You think that scares me?"

Conflicted emotions flickered across his face, and he cast a glance through the window, at where Ma was washing the dishes. Then he nodded. "Lead the way, then. We don't have much time."

-x-

Reeve was fast when he wanted to be. I struggled to keep up with him, not because I had bad stamina but because his legs were much, much longer than mine. "How much time do we have left?" I shouted as we tore through the jungle.

He swerved around the tree and leaped over the root, some mysterious force infusing him with newfound bravado. "A day, maybe two? All I know is that mako doesn't affect the surroundings unless there's an abundance in the atmosphere. How long has the forest been like this?"

Even I knew the answer to this question. "Decades, probably. Ma grew up with it."

"Fantastic," Reeve muttered. "Just great. The last time a mako reactor malfunctioned, it was Freeday Valley, and that reactor had been working for..." He cursed. "Twenty years and it was breaking down. What does that mean for one that's forty-years old?"

"Nothing good, I assume," I said. No wonder the monsters didn't want to get close to the reactor. They knew better than to poke a sleeping Bahamut. "Come on, we're almost there."

The forest began to part, and we burst onto the dirt path that the townspeople had congregated on a few hours ago. Now that there weren't any people blocking the view, we could see a round structure in the distance. Each of its two jutting towers was emblazoned with a familiar logo: ShinRa.

The _smell._

"I see what you mean," I coughed as we stumbled onto the path.

"Pretty obvious now, huh?" Reeve smiled grimly. "It's leaking at a much faster rate, meaning the reactor is dangerously close to erupting."

Erupting?

"Erupting?"

"Did I say erupt? I mean explode in a big, flashy, catastrophic ball of fire."

"Don't joke around," I said, skidding to a halt. I scowled at Reeve when he stopped and turned to glance at me, that prickle of irritation blooming into resentment. "Mako doesn't explode, that's not how it works."

"You don't understand," he said. "You're too young."

"So treat me like an adult!"

For the first time, Reeve's face contorted into a scowl, or the closest approximation to a scowl his kind face would allow.

"Fine, then! Here's the truth, the real _adult_ truth: there's more than just mako in a reactors, things ShinRa doesn't talk about, things that only appear in blueprints, and that's only if you're a _very _keen-eyed ShinRa manager who cares about those sorts of details. I know these buildings better than i know the back of my hand, so believe me when I say you do _not _want to have this conversation with me right now."

I scowled, unwilling to admit that he was correct, but also unwilling to apologize for the sake of my pride. Instead, I muttered, "What do you need me to do, then?"

When we reached the front door, Reeve entered a code into the keypad then yanked it open. We ducked into a circular room with two sets of stairs on either side. Every inch of the place was covered in rust and practically bursting with mako that tinted the air green.

"Find the control room," Reeve said, pointing to the left set of stairs as he headed for the right. "When you do, give me a shout."

"Then what?" I pressed.

Reeve gave me an exasperated look. "I'll need to see it first. But in every reactor, there's an emergency shut-down sequence that we can start, though the type of sequence depends on the reactor. Small front entrance, keypad, must be an old model... MR70-II, maybe? No, too old, would've been taken down in the 70s." He began to mutter under his breath.

I ran to the stairs and began to climb. "For a mere manager, you seem to know a lot about reactors."

"I would hope so. After all, I'm the one who designed them."

Oh. My face felt hot._ Well, that's embarrassing._

I quickened my pace and leaped up the last few steps to the second floor. The stairs opened into another wide space, almost like a lobby, with three doors on the opposite wall, each with a tiny window that I could peep through. Then there was another set of stairs taking me to the third floor, presumably an attic or workspace.

The floor shuddered beneath my feet, and I stumbled backwards, barely grabbing the railing in time to prevent myself from plummeting to my death. Green filtered through the slits beneath the left and right doors.

Alright, maybe avoid those.

I made a beeline for the center door. There was a passcode-protected keypad, and I wracked my brain for the combination Reeve entered just a few moments ago.

Top-left, middle-center, middle-right, bottom-right. 1-5-6-9. The door popped open, and I hid a satisfied grin.

Inside, there was a control panel that sat beneath a wide window overlooking a bubbling vat of green liquid. Beyond the glass, a massive auditorium was covered with ledges and ladders and maintenance tools of all kind, intended to keep the mako in perfect condition. To either side, the walls were covered in cameras, and I saw Reeve poking his head into one of the rooms. I rushed for the microphone near the monitor and tapped it.

"Reeve? I found it. It's to the left on the second floor, middle door."

"_You did? Fantastic! I'm on my way._"

Two seconds later, his footsteps were outside the door. It slammed open, and Reeve rushed in and headed straight for the control panel. I followed him and watched him tap a seemingly random array of buttons on the dashboard. The reactor rumbled as it started up again. "Should've made the emergency button big and red," I heard him mutter to himself. Then he blanched. "Oh no."

"Oh no?" I asked, wary.

"I... might've rebooted the system at a bad time."

The window darkened, apparently not just a window but a screen as well. _Emergency shut-down sequence activated, _it said in flashing red letters. Then it threw a curveball at us: _Warning: Mako contamination at dangerous levels. Commencing self-destruct sequence in: 10:00 minutes. 9:59. 9:58._

"What?" I hissed as Reeve whirled around and scrambled for the door. "That's just stupid!" I whirled upon him. "Why'd you design such a stupid mechanism?"

"It's an MR45 model," Reeve replied. "I was young—well, younger—and had my head in the clouds. I went for cool graphics over functionality, and now we're paying for it." He bolted the door and shoved himself against it. Then he seemed to change his mind and yanked off his jacket, leaving only his white shirt underneath. Then he stuffed it into the crack beneath the door.

"Well, what's the fucking difference?" I very near shouted at him.

"Shut-down was meant for employees to activate in case of a physical emergency, if a terrorism group or rival company took over. It-It would wipe our computers, create a vacuum to retrieve every last bit of mako from the atmosphere, and stop the production of mako energy immediately."

"And self-destruct?"

He grimaced. "Automatic. It'll give us 10 minutes to get out of the building and to a safe range before it blows up everything in the vicinity, us included."

"Obviously we can't have that. Can we override the self-destruct?"

"I'm an architect, not a programmer." Reeve rubbed his hands through his hair and let out a frustrated scream. "One's going to blow us up, while the other will save our lives. Problem is, they started simultaneously." He paused. Something strange flickered across his complexion. "We're just going to have to wing it."

"_Wing it? _The entire town's in danger and you want us to _wing it?_" I said, voice climbing in hysterics.

Oh, it wasn't out of concern for myself. I wouldn't die for a few decades, not until I played out my fate. But my parents, my ma and my da and my entire village—they were fair game. And that _terrified _me.

And Reeve—stupid, naive, stubborn Reeve, who couldn't get his own head out of his ass long enough to see what was right in front of him this whole time—

I spared a glance at Reeve, who had taken off his shirt and stuffed it beneath the door with his jacket. His eyes had begun to glow with a film of green, and his breath came out in short gasps. Early mako poisoning.

He was trying to protect me.

A strange calm settled over me. "Okay," I heard myself say quietly. "Okay, tell me what to do."

Determination flashed across Reeve's face. "We can't cancel any of these programs, but what we can do it speed one of them up."

"What? And what's the point of that?" I blurted, a sliver of doubt worming into my head.

"Can't you trust me this once?" Reeve all but begged. "Look. If the shut-down sequence is hurried up and finishes before the self-destruct, the self-destruct will also shut down, get it? So do exactly as I say."

I forced myself to nod.

"Blue keyboard on the right of the control panel. Type in R-e-e-v-e, space, T-u-e-s-t-i."

Click. Tap. Tap.

"My password is caitsith1967midgar. No spaces, no capital letters."

_Cait Sith,_ I typed. _1967, Midgar._

"You'll see a desktop. On the bottom right corner, there's a tiny ShinRa icon. Click on it."

I did.

"Good." His voice began to sound faint, and he forced himself to shake it off. "Sorry. Are you doing everything I'm saying?"

"Yes."

"Thank you. Now."

Reeve led me through the steps carefully. I began to sweat, making my fingers slippery. The building began to hum, trembling as its systems readied themselves for self-destruction. I cursed when my hand slipped. "Sorry."

"Concentrate." Reeve let his head fall against the door, his eyes fluttering shut. "Really wish I was a SOLDIER right about now," he said, forcing himself to laugh. "Wouldn't have to deal with this..." He waved a hand at himself. "...mess."

"Yeah, well, it's not all it's cracked up to be," I muttered, wincing. My head kind of hurt. The screen darkened, showing the same numbers ticking down second by second. _1__:00. 0:59. _"Okay, now what?"

"Now," Reeve said, "you press the big red button."

I looked over the panel and felt my heart skip a beat. "Reeve, there are a lot of big red buttons." When I didn't hear an answer, I whirled around, head throbbing. Thirty-nine seconds and counting. "Reeve!" His entire body had gone limp as he leaned against the door. I rushed to his side and shook him by his shoulders. "Which red button?"

"What?" he muttered. I slapped him. "Crap!" He lurched forward. "Yeah. On the side! Get away, quickly."

I rushed back to the control panel and ducked down. A row of buttons was attached to the side of the dashboard, each labelled with a different number. I touched the red one. "This one, right?"

"Yes."

We had a fifty-fifty chance. If this procedure sped up the self-destruct mechanism instead of the shut-down one, we were screwed. My hand trembled, and I stared at it. Was I scared? _Now?_

_Nine seconds. Eight. Seven._

"Do it!" shouted Reeve as the building trembled and the vat behind the glass began to gurgle. "Do it, Al, do it now!"

"You better be right," I said.

Then I punched the button.

-x-

The groaning noise eased, then stopped altogether. A suction billowed through the room, ruffling my clothes.

Eventually, when I could feel my arms again, I peeled open my eyes and peered around. Then I locked gazes with Reeve from the other side of the room, who looked similarly shocked. "We're not dead?"

"We're not dead." He let out a bark of laughter. "We're not dead!"

Legs shaking, I backed away from the control panel and collapsed with a sob of relief by the wall. "Holy shit," I whispered, pressing a hand to my heart as the cold steel touched my back. The mounting headache disappeared as if it'd never existed in the first place. "We got... so fucking lucky this time."

"Language," Reeve chided, but it was half-hearted at best.

"We saved the town from being blown up off the map and you're worried about my language? Get your priorities straight."

"Yeah, well." Reeve sighed and rubbed the back of his head, his hair falling to frame his face. The collar of his shirt was damp with sweat, and he loosened his tie and fell backwards against the wall. "Goddess, that was enough action for a lifetime." He paused. "I'll need to make a report to ShinRa. We've stopped the obvious catastrophe, but that doesn't mean there aren't side-effects."

The adrenaline fled from my veins in a whoosh, and my legs crumpled beneath me. I found myself fighting back a yawn. "You do that," I said. My eyes fluttered, and I resisted the urge to rub them.

Reeve groaned, then dragged himself to his feet using the door handle, nearly falling to the floor again. "We need to get you home," he said as he stumbled to my side and offered me a hand. "I'm already in big trouble for dragging you into this in the first place. Who knows what your mother will do to me if I bring you home after curfew?"

"She won't be upset. I left her a note," I said, succumbing to my urge to yawn. I yelped as Reeve swept me off my feet and settled me on his hip like a toddler, but I didn't protest, instead letting my chin fall on his shoulder. He smelled of apples and something artificial.

"You sure?"

"Absolutely," I said. I let my eyes flutter close and murmured, "You're amazing, you know that?"

"What was that?" came his amused voice by my ear. It had a strange quality to it. Like it was piercing through a fog.

I yawned again. "I said—"

And I was asleep.

-x-

One minute, I was dozing comfortably in Reeve's arms. The next, I was deposited on the ground, and a sharp pain pricked my ear as Ma dragged me stumbling and confused to towards the kitchen table.

"Mr. Tuesti, get yourself cleaned up. Shower's upstairs," Ma said as she threw me into the kitchen and pinned me to place with her glare. All of my sleepiness fled in an instant.

Reeve cleared his throat. Most of the mako had dissipated from his eyes when we made our way back to the village, but there was still remnants of it clinging to his clothes, which must've been what I smelled when he carried me over. "Thank you, Grace."

"Don't think I'm done with you yet," said Ma. "Dragging an eight-year old to a malfunctioning mako reactor while leaving only a note on the kitchen counter? You should be ashamed of yourself." While Reeve muttered his excuses and generally looked cowed, Ma whirled around and stood over me with her hands on her hips. "And you. Do you know how long we were looking for you, Al?"

I blinked rapidly, staring up at Ma's furious expression. "Ma, I'm sorry," I began.

"Don't interrupt me." Ma pinched her brow, the worry in her eyes melting into a sort of tranquil fury. "Your da and I waited for hours. We thought you were _dead_."

I didn't tell her how narrowly we all escaped death. "You don't need to worry about me," I said instead. "I can take care of myself."

"I'm your _ma, _Al. I'm always going to worry about you."

"What if I don't need your worry?" I said under my breath, repeating it when Ma snapped, "Excuse me?" My hands became fists at my sides. "What if I run away to Midgar where you'll never find me?"

Pain flared on my cheek.

I stared at the ground in shock, suddenly struggling to hide the stinging tears that welled in my eyes. Ma stared back at me unflinchingly, her hand still raised and palm red from where she slapped me.

"You're not going anywhere without my permission," she said quietly.

I found myself shouting at her, tears blurring my vision and a sense of _betrayal _replacing any guilt I felt over my actions. "You're not always going to be there, Ma! Maybe one day a monster will kill you, and then I'll be alone in this fucking country without a ma, without a da, and utterly unprepared for what's out there, so don't you _dare _tell me what to do, don't you _dare!"_

"Zackary Alistair Fair," Ma said, her voice rising in volume as her chest heaved with anger, "how _dare _you?" Her finger dug into my collarbone and pushed me back, and I fell on one of the kitchen chairs, leaning away from her blunt nails. "You're my son first and foremost, and _damn _if I let anything happen to me before I see your eighteenth birthday!"

Silence. Ma backed off and let me stand up.

"You're Zackary Fair?" asked Reeve.

I scowled at the ground. "Not now," I said, wiping my arm across my tear-stained face and refusing to meet Ma's gaze.

"No," said Reeve, stepping down the stairs and fixing me with those wide gray eyes, "_you're _Zack Fair? The same one who warned me about the detrimental effects mako might have on the environment? The one who connected it to the oil shortages we had centuries ago?"

Ma glanced between us. Her mood fouled visibly. "Oh, so you were mailing this man without my knowing, hm? Did you think you could get away with it?"

I didn't want to get away with anything. I just wanted to _change _things, to make them better than what they were before, starting with the one ShinRa employee I knew still had a heart.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

I glared at my shoes and refused to reply. Knowing that she wasn't going to get anything out of me for a while now, Ma jerked her hand towards the stairs and glared at me with furious violet eyes. "Go to your room, Zackary."

"It's _Al,_" I whispered to no one.

Then I bolted up the stairs.


	2. before and after

hey! welcome to chapter 2.

i messed with some of the stuff in chapter 1, edited some things, added new dialogue, so go check it out! it's hopefully better in context.

also, exposition galore! yayyyyyy

* * *

Humans are selfish.

Human evolution has made it very clear: Altruism, _true _altruism doesn't exist. Every action has an equal opposite reaction. If you perform a good task, you expect something in return.

Human selfishness, then, is how we cope with the threat of non-existence. If helping someone will destroy yourself, then why would you do help at all?

No one wants to die, and no one thinks they're going to die until the last possible second. You walk down a street and forget to look both ways for cars, but it's okay, because there's no way you're dying today. Our brains are funny like that. Sometimes they forget the only constant in life is death.

But in my case, even death wouldn't grant me peace.

-x-

My first new memory was of a woman's face, brow furrowing in panic and grasping my cheeks with her labor-rough hands.

"Zack? Zackary! Zack, can you hear me?"

Her face swayed in my vision. Messy tufts of dark hair, eyes a blue so deep they bordered on violet, and an accent that emphasized the last consonant of my name. Za-_cuh, _Za-_cuh, _that what it always sounded like. There was only one person that could be.

"Ma?" I slurred. "Wha' happened?"

There was red everywhere, smeared across my hands, across her smock, on her face as my trembling fingers found their way to her cheek. A muscle leaped on her jaw.

"_Tian ah_," a person said, "is he alright?"

(_He died_, the woman next to me—not woman, I reminded myself—murmured as we watched the small body drift down the stream, trailing a ribbon of rust in the water behind it. I said nothing, watching the five-year old boy's corpse bump against the bank and spin in a lazy circle.

_It wasn't meant to happen so soon. An error. An unprecedented mistake. _The Goddess waved her hand and the image disappeared from the dark expanse of space we occupied. _But I can do nothing. His soul is in the hands of the Lifestream now._

"And I wasn't?"

_Close, but not quite,_ she said. _Same, but not the same._)

We were next to a river, I think. Beyond the forest, the sun was a golden disk dipping below the horizon, setting the sky blaze. A golden koi fish coiled through the air and glanced at me with oily black eyes. _Better get up,_ it seemed to say, _before someone finds you._

My entire body thrummed with pain, centered somewhere around my head. Someone had dragged me by my legs, leaving ugly strips of skin where my arms had scraped against the ground. And my hands... They were riddled with scratches.

Did he die in fear? Did he struggle valiantly before succumbing to the bliss of nothing, realizing there was nothing he could do to prevent the inevitable?

Did he die with his ma's name on his lips?

"Zack," pleaded Ma, "Zack, talk to me, sweetie."

"Get him some towels," someone murmured in the background. A shadow nodded and slipped from the forest.

I blinked blearily and stared at the sky, wondering why I was so cold. Then someone wrapped a fluffy towel around my shoulders and muttered something under their breath, causing a full-body shudder to rip through me. I gasped as a blanket of warmth fell upon my skin.

(_There are fixed points_, the Goddess told me. _Zack Fair _(and my heart leaped at the name) _will always be born in 1984 to a small Gongagan family of two. Zack Fair will always run away at the age of thirteen to join ShinRa. Zack Fair will always die on that cliff overlooking Midgar._

I scowled at the mention of these familiar events. "And you want me to, what, play your little game like a good little SOLDIER?"

Her perfect lips curled into something resembling a smile_. __I know you will._)

Once I was no longer hyperventilating and was safely curled up in Ma's arms, a raspy voice spoke out. "_Xifu, _I apologize."

Ma's voice lashed out, changing from a warm coo to a frigid snarl. "Don't," she said, and I let myself be lifted into the air and pressed close to her chest. I stared over her shoulder, picking out a few uneasy faces in the darknesss. "Just... don't."

"Grace," murmured another voice.

"Come on. I'm taking Zack home."

A pause. Ma's tone turned sharp. "Come on, _Todd. _Let's go."

After a moment of hesitation, the shadow slipped from the crowd of murmuring spectators and joined Ma's side. A rough hand curled around my own, rubbing their calloused thumb over my knuckles. "Zack..."

I blinked blearily at the man's face, so similar to my own. I remember— No, I don't_— _No, no, a face in the mirror, a steady hand guiding mine over a set of alphabet blocks, whispering strange syllables in my ear. _Yi _for one, _er _for two, abrupt consonants and rolling vowels, so different from the town's that it might as well have been a different language. There was a woman, too, black hair falling over an intelligent face, shrewd eyes softening with pride when I arranged the blocks to spell her name. _Grace. _

Ma? Grace was my ma. Mother. _Mother, I will destroy the world that shunned you_— No, that was later. A frost-bitten town, a green-tinted room.

Now? Now I was led into a car, and my head fell on someone's shoulder as we pulled away from a house. There was a house? I struggled to turn around and watched a pinprick of light shrink into the distance.

"Rest, Zack," came Ma's voice in a whisper "We'll be home soon."

The rest of the trip passed in a blur. I faded in and out of consciousness, my soul and my body working at odds with each other to recalibrate our systems, so to speak. Once I woke with Ma's hand on my forehead and worried voices conversing over my limp figure. Another time I jolted awake with a name hovering on the tip of my tongue and tears pricking my eyes.

Hate tore through my mind, breaking the fog for a split second. I hated the Goddess, hated the circumstances that had brought me here, hated the little boy for tripping and falling and dying in the same breath.

Too late, another wave of exhaustion washed over me. I grit my teeth and fell back into darkness.

The town filtered in through the mist. Those of us in the backseat were jostled as the road became bumpy and uneven. The driver murmured a brief apology and offered nothing else.

"Let's go," Ma said before the car had even completely come to a stop in the town square. She cradled me in her arms and rushed down the shadow-smothered path.

Home was a cottage squeezed between two other identical twins. It was cramped but homely, sectioned off into the kitchen, living room, and upstairs area. Strips of sausage and dried meat hung from the ceiling, filling the air with the scent of spices and herbs. The narrow staircase led to an even narrower hallway with three rooms.

Once I had stumbled and tripped my way upstairs, Ma helped me tug off my wet clothes as I sat on my familiar-unfamiliar bed.

My eyes wandered. Pictures littered the walls, drawn by an unsteady hand and pinned proudly to every crevice of the room. There was a handmade wooden desk crammed in the corner, covered with colored pencils. One of its legs was bent so the table tilted to one side. A wilting plant drooped on the windowsill.

There was a picture on his nightstand. A bright-eye boy had his arms wrapped around his parents's shoulders, dragging them down into frame. A smear of white frosting on the corner of his mouth interrupted his grin. _Fourth birthday! _the caption said.

I wasn't cold anymore, but I shivered, tearing my gaze away.

Ma yanked off my socks harder than necessary. "What were you thinking, Zack?" she asked, addressing me for the first time since the accident. Her brow was furrowed with anger, but not at me. At herself, probably.

The memory hit me like a brick. "I wan'ed to play with the tadpoles." _He wanted to play with the tadpoles?_

"_No,_ Zack," snapped Ma as she turned around and rummaged through his—_ my _wardrobe. "I told you, remember? We have to wait until summer to do that. The water's too cold."

That explained why he hadn't just swam out as soon as he fell in. The combination of the head injury and the shock must've killed him instantly.

A thought. I caught the pants and blue shirt with a green frog that she tossed me and pulled them on. "Ma, what's my middle name?"

She paused, a flicker of worry darting across her face before she masked it with confusion. "Must've hit your head harder than I thought," she muttered, running her hands through my damp hair and straightening my collar. She tugged me to my feet and held out her hand. "Come on, let's go see if Doctor Freeman's home."

"But what is it?" I repeated, struggling to keep up with her much longer legs.

Ma looked surprised. "It's Alistair, like your grandpa," she said. "Zackary Alistair Fair."

Alistair.

Al.

I almost laughed. That stupid, idiotic Goddess. I wanted to rip her perfect head off her body and toss it into the Crater with her so-called mortal enemy so they could stew there together for eternity.

Zackary Alistair Fair, the boy destined to die.

"I like that," I said as I toddled down the stairs. "Can you call me tha' from now on?"

We stopped at the base of the steps. I snuck a peak at Ma's expression.

"You hated being called Alistair," Ma said, her brow furrowing. "Said it made you sound a stuffy old man." She stopped, gathered her words, then started again. "But if you changed your mind... Alistair it is."

"No," I said, heart pounding. "Not Alistair. _Al._"

Ma paused and glanced down. "Okay, Al."

_(You will help me fix this, you of another world. Death is your end and your beginning._

"I won't play your game."

_You don't have a choice._)

-x-

I left Reeve standing there with his mouth agape, glancing between Ma and I like he was trying to dislodge his head from his shoulders. I threw myself to my bed, burrowing myself like a mole into my blankets. The walls in my house were thin enough that I could still hear snippets of conversation downstairs.

"Your child is very smart," Reeve was saying.

Ma's sharp laugh-snort could be heard even upstairs from my bedroom. "You can sleep on the couch tonight, Mr. Tuesti."

"No, I mean it."

"You're very kind, but I insist that you go to bed now. It's getting late."

Pause. Then Reeve said, "Are you planning on sending him to a boarding school?"

For the first time, Da's voice spoke up, low and unassuming as it always was. "Mr. Tuesti, how was your day? Was dinner to your taste?"

"Hm? Oh, it was wonderful, thank you. But Al—"

"You fixed the reactor, yes? We're all very thankful for that. I'm sorry you couldn't see more of Gongaga, but if you're willing to come back sometime else, we'll welcome you with open arms and show you a better side of this town. I'm sure you know, but Gongaga is very famous for our fish stew."

Reeve perked up, interested. "Yes, the fish stew. It was amazing, better than anything I've had in Midgar. How did you do it?"

"Oh, you'll have to ask Grace." I could hear Da's smile in his voice. "The things she can do with a radish."

"Todd," Ma began.

"You're amazing, Grace," said Reeve, and I could tell the genuine respect in his voice embarrassed Ma. "I mean, I can barely make cereal without disaster."

Without even trying, Da had diverted the conversation to safer waters. As the conversation drifted into harmless chatter, I closed my eyes. Another day tomorrow, I thought.

Tomorrow.

-x-

A few hours later, the edge of my bed dipped, and a presence settled near my feet. Face pressed to my pillow, I woke up when a light touch fluttered over my face, touching my cheek.

"Al?"

No response.

A sigh. The mattress creaked as Ma turned to face the window. I opened my eyes, just a slit, and saw how the moonlight grazed her exhausted features. She wasn't old, not by a long shot, but there were creases at the corners of her eyes that weren't smile lines. "I'm sorry for yelling at you. I just... I worry about you too much."

I said nothing, pretending to be fast asleep.

"Oh, Al." A jolt of surprise went through me when I realized Ma was crying. "What will I do if you die? You're growing up so fast, and I-I can't bear to see you leave so soon."

Like a coward, I didn't respond.

Her chapped lips brushed against my forehead. "Good night, Al. I love you."

-x-

When I woke up, something felt wrong. Reeve's voice wasn't quietly discussing cultural osmosis with Da in the living room. Ma wasn't interjecting every once in a while with her own opinion, often completely contradicting theirs. I stared at the ceiling for a while more, straining my ears and wishing I could hear that far, then threw off my blankets and ran down the stairs in the same rumpled clothes I wore yesterday.

Ma let out a shout of warning when I sprinted past the kitchen, but didn't stop me from throwing open the door and gazing out into the town square. Reeve whirled around, blinking. There was row of ShinRa-issued military trucks parked behind him, waiting to take him home.

"Al!" he said, surprised. "I thought I was being sneaky when I woke up this morning."

"You were," I said, a little bit out of breath. I straightened and stared at him accusingly. "I thought you were going to stay."

"I'm sorry," Reeve said. "There's been a change of plans. I have so much work to do at ShinRa, so staying here isn't going to do me much good."

No. He couldn't leave. There were so many things I needed to tell him, so many ideas that we hadn't exchanged. I inhaled, about to retort, when his expression caught me off guard. It wasn't the lingering smile on his lips, or the fidgety nature of his stance. It was his _eyes_, bright with wonder, bright with determination, and for a second I wondered if this visit had helped him more than it helped me.

I swallowed my reply and nodded. I heard Ma's footsteps behind me. "So I guess this is it," I said.

"Yup."

"Anything else you want to say?"

Reeve smiled and stuck out his hand. "Keep in touch, Al."

A wide grin spread on my face. I accepted the handshake with vigor. "Absolutely." We shook on it. Behind me, I heard Ma let out a groan and mutter something about conniving little boys and their mentors.

Reeve noticed this. "Your mother isn't still mad at you for what happened, is she?"

I shook my head. "She's still a little pissed that I ran off by myself, but..." I shrugged and tried not to show my sheepishness on my face. "I'll explain everything. She'll understand." Probably.

"Thank you," Reeve said. "Really. You opened my eyes to a world of possibility."

I flushed, remembering our conversation on the steps yesterday. I hadn't meant to sound so forceful, nor like I was on the verge of crying.

Clearing my throat, I said, "So what are you gonna do now?"

Reeve scratched the back of his neck and shrugged. "I go back. I'll tell ShinRa what happened here, and they'll send someone to check out the mako reactor, see if they can recycle it somehow. Though given what happened here yesterday, I doubt that that will happen."

True. It wasn't as if Gongaga's local economy depended on the reactor, either. If it disappeared, we'd simply live our lives normally, though we'd have to find a new place to hide when the local monsters invaded.

Reeve suddenly perked up. "Oh, that reminds me." He rushed over to the first truck in the line and said something to the infantryman, who rummaged around and retrieved a square package from the back seat. Then he returned with a proud look on his face. "This is yours. I was going to leave it with your mother, but now that you're here, I'll give it to you."

I accepted it and almost fell backwards. It was heavier than I'd expected, covered with hard components that poked me through the thick packaging. "What is it?" I asked, turning it over.

"A computer."

"A _computer?_"

"You're welcome." Reeve's grin was brilliant. "Newly issued from ShinRa. You like it?"

I ripped open the package and ran my hand over the black screen, prodding the various buttons and mechanics. The computer was advanced for this time period, but I knew it'd be completely obsolete after the new model came out next year. But for Reeve, who was relatively low on ShinRa's hierarchy, to pull a never-seen-before model fresh off the press and give it to me, a boy he'd met face-to-face only once?

It was incredibly generous, and _very_ characteristic of the one man at ShinRa who still owned a heart.

"Thank you," I said, hugging it to my chest. "This is amazing."

Reeve's pleased smile faltered when he saw me wipe my eyes. "Wait, are you crying?"

"Am not," I said, whirling around.

"Oh, Goddess, I made an eight-year old cry. What would your mother say now?"

"That you're incredibly generous for giving Al such a wonderful gift," said Ma as she stepped forward, hand landing on my shoulder and making me start. Her eyes weren't unkind when she looked at Reeve. "Thank you for all you've done for this town, Mr. Tuesti."

"It was nothing, Grace—"

"No, really. I may not approve of your methods, but we wouldn't be alive today if it weren't for you and Al." Ma sighed. "As much as I hate to say this, I guess you lot at ShinRa aren't that bad after all."

Reeve laughed awkwardly. "I wouldn't say that, exactly. But I appreciate the compliment anyways."

We stepped back. Reeve hesitated, then stumbled as one of the infantrymen tugged him backwards towards the truck. "Thank you for everything, Al, Grace," he called as he climbed into the backseat. The engine revved, and he twisted around and continued to wave until we couldn't see him anymore.

Once Reeve was out of sight, Ma asked, "You like him, don't you?"

"He's nice," I said.

"Hm. Maybe we could visit Midgar one day. If your da agrees, of course."

It was her way of apologizing. I perked up. "You mean it, Ma?"

She waved it off. "Get ready for school, Al."

-x-

The teacher swept through the yard, ringing her tiny bell and herding students into the schoolhouse. I stood up and brushed off my hands, looking down at my drawing in the dirt with triumph. At my side, Alice groaned and hopped off the fence, brushing off her pale-pink dress.

"This is so dumb, Al. Let's just go in."

"_You're _dumb," I retorted

"Haha, very funny. Honestly, are you five?"

"Eight, actually," corrected Jackson from my other side. He reached over to tug on Alice's pigtails and grinned when she whirled around and glared at him. "Sorry. Love girls with black hair and blue eyes."

"We're almost all dark-haired and blue-eyed, you weirdo," said Alice irritatedly. "And don't even try, Jackson, I _know _you like Al more than me."

Jackson held his hands up. His black sweatshirt was smeared with chalk, which I squinted at, bemused. "Guilty as charged."

Unable to resist it, I blew him a kiss. He caught it and held it to his heart dramatically. Alice grabbed our hands and she tugged us towards the schoolhouse, which was really just a renovated two-story house with terrible ventilation. "Come on. We're going to be late for Common."

"Common," Jackson bemoaned as we lined up for attendance, "my worst subject."

"Is not," said Alice.

"Is too!"

I don't want to hear a word from you, you perfect-scorer," I interjected.

"This is discrimination," Jackson complained. "I can't help that you guys are just terrible at memorization."

Alice stifled a giggle. Her eyes widened as I whirled on her, and she shook her head, hands jerking up in surrender. "I said nothing," she swore. I narrowed my eyes and jerked my fingers between us. _I'm watching you._

We paused momentarily as the teacher called Alice and my names. Then Alice lowered her voice as the teacher continued with attendance. "Did you guys hear about what happened with the reactor yesterday?"

Jackson nodded and wiggled his fingers. "Supposedly we almost died because of a malfunction. They even had to activate the emergency shut-down mechanism." His eyes gleamed. _So who activated it? _he didn't ask. "But it's all rumors and hearsay."

"There were ShinRa troops all over the place this morning," said Alice. "You think rumors can summon the actual army to our doorstep?"

"You guys are gossiping like old ladies," I said.

"We _are _old ladies," said Jackson. "We're ancient."

Alice rolled her eyes and mouthed at me behind his back, "He thinks he's a hot-shot because he turned ten last month." I hid a snicker.

The teacher called Jackson's name. "Over here!" he shouted over his shoulder, then turned back to us. "Well, we're not getting a straight answer out of the adults. Why don't we investigate for ourselves after school?"

Panic made me hiss, "No!" rather loudly, making Jackson and Alice shoot me twin looks of shock. I quickly amended myself. "It's too dangerous, didn't you hear? It almost blew up yesterday, who knows what will happen if we poke a sleeping Bahamut?"

"You would _gladly _poke a sleeping summon if it meant you could learn something," muttered Alice.

We began to shuffle towards our desks, taking our customary seats in the back of the classroom. Gongaga didn't have enough children to separate into grades, so instead the older kids were stuffed into one corner of the room and given worksheets to work on while the teacher taught the younger kids letters and basic addition.

The teacher handed out the worksheets, and Jackson lifted it to his face, scanning it. Boredom quickly overtook his expression, and he set down the paper and gazed at me. "So about that reactor," he started.

"_No._"

"We can't look at it? Not even a little bit?"

"Not unless you want to be run over by a monster," I said. "Or get mako poisoning, do you want that?"

Alice rested her chin on her hand and narrowed her eyes at me. "You seem very adamant about not going, Al," she said. "Are you hiding something?"

"No," I said.

"He's definitely lying," said Jackson.

"I'm not. I swear." I paused. "Look, if you want to throw yourself into a hopeless endeavor, then do it, what do I care? But don't come running back to me when it all comes crashing over your heads."

Alice asked, "Can we at least come over to your house?"

"Not today."

"Stingy," muttered Jackson as he began to write. "_Someone_'s keeping a secret."

Sometimes I hated how well he knew me.

-x-

After the Incident, capital "I" and all, Ma refused to let me out of the house for a week.

I protested, of course. Even at the age of five, I understand the merits of the outdoors. More importantly, I was jittery, unfocused, even more so than when I was twenty-something and seeing the world for the shithole it really was.

Da took my personality change in stride like he did with everything else in life. When he saw me bouncing off the walls of the house, nearly out of my mind with boredom and anticipation, he chuckled and ruffled my hair, muttering something about how grateful he was to not have to bury another body.

After the first day or so, I couldn't keep still anymore. I followed Ma around the house and pestered her with questions. She kept her answers close to her chest, only replying when it suited her needs. Her intuition was sharp; without even realizing it, she'd picked up on the strangeness of the situation and raised her guard against it.

Ma's wariness mostly originated from her worry. When she wasn't writing papers or interviewing clients, she badgered me with her own questions, ensuring that my personality shift was just a natural course of life and not caused by the head injury. She grew more and more aggressive, commanding every minute of my day, refusing to let me play with my old friends or even venture out into the forest by myself anymore.

Eventually, I stopped talking to the kids my age entirely, though I suspected it was in part due to my massive change in attitude. Children dealt with abnormality even worse than adults, and having the previously chirpy Zack become a random genius who knew why the sky was blue and how to multiply three-digit numbers was definitely odd.

As spring came and passed, the Gongagan summer smacked us in the face like a farmer with a sack of potatoes. An unbearable heat smothered the town from the north, making the trees drip with humidity. Thankfully, there was an array of trees behind my house that blocked the sun and provided some semblance of shade. This is where I spent most of my summer.

Well, until I met them.

One morning, I was etching something in the dirt with a twig_—remember their faces, remember what you lost_—when twin shadows fell upon my crouched figure. "You're a terrible drawer," a childish voice said, rather pompously. "What is that, a potato?"

"Don't be mean, Al," chided another. "He's doing his best, can't you tell?"

I mentally steeled myself for the normal jeers and taunts. Then I looked up. To either side stood two children, maybe seven or eight, dressed in dirt-smeared clothes and carrying a plastic bag swimming with tadpoles. The girl, an awkward thing with long limbs and jutting elbows, tossed her pigtails over her shoulder and frowned. I blinked, bemused.

"You're really not very good at drawing," she pointed out.

The boy crouched down at my side and pointed to the doodle on the far right. "Lemme guess. That's a mushroom."

"It's a man, actually," I corrected, glancing at him. He had a mop of black hair that fell over his forehead in a messy sweep (typical) and pale green eyes (not typical). "Who are you two?"

"I'm Alice," said the girl. Something about the sweep of her brow and the firm line of her mouth seemed familiar.

"Jackson," said the boy, sticking out his hand. "Shake my hand. It's very professional."

After a moment of hesitation, I did. "I'm Alistair."

"I've heard of you," said Alice as I rose to my feet. "Zack Fair. You're the boy that fell into the river a few days ago."

"Your name's Alistair?" Jackson asked. "Wait, we can't have two 'Al's. That's gonna get confusing."

"No one calls me Al," said Alice.

"Then you can be Al instead," Jackson said, pointing at me. He grinned, and I was taken aback by how bright his eyes shown through the shadows. "Now you're the only Al around!"

"That's nice." I waited for them to get bored and leave.

Alice hit Jackson over the head with her bag of tadpoles. "Don't listen to him," she told me, rolling her eyes. But it lacked the usual sting of the action. "He thinks he's so clever, but he's really not."

This wasn't the direction I'd imagined the conversation taking. I'd become used to jeers and screaming, children shunning me for the change from cheerful, outgoing Zack to clumsy, clumsy Al with two left feet and oversized hands, who walked like he wasn't used to his own body. They were different, and I found that I didn't mind this strangeness.

"How's your injury?" Alice asked. "My ma told me you hit your head and that's why you're acting so weird."

"So you're a doctor now?" asked Jackson. Alice swung the bag again, and he dodged. "Ha, missed!"

"Yeah," I interrupted. "Yeah, I hit my head. That's why... Well, that's why I'm like this." I shrugged. "Guess that's why no one wants to talk to me now. I'm too different."

Alice crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. "Huh."

Jackson cast her a quick glance that said nothing and everything at once. Then he smiled at me. "We'll talk to you! I mean, we never knew you before so it's like not we have expectations or anything."

Alice looked furious, eyes like shards of dark ice on her face. "People are jerks," she snapped. "Don't listen to their stupid opinions."

I wondered if she had some deep psychosocial issue she wanted to talk about. Then I found that I didn't care. "Thanks, I guess."

"No problem," chirped Jackson. "Let me introduce myself again. Jackson Kunsel, genius extraordinaire, at your service!"

Halfway turned around to continue doodling in the dirt, I whirled around at his name, eyes widening.

Kunsel? Kunsel wasn't from Gongaga. He was a Second with a penchant for sticking his nose where it didn't belong, not a smiling boy with coal-black hair and pale green eyes. Besides, Kunsel was his first name... Right?

This better not be another one of the Goddess' games.

"Alice Freeman," said Alice, interrupting my whirling thoughts. "Nice to meet you."

"We'll be your friends from now on," said Jackson. "No, don't protest. You don't have a choice in the matter."

"Thanks?" I said, unable to stop it from sounding like a question. I hesitated, feeling a prick of uncertainty. But looking at Jackson's smile, seeing Alice roll her eyes fondly and gaze back at me expectantly, ready to accept me into their little group, I couldn't refuse.

"Alistair Fair. It's a pleasure."

-x-

"I swear to the Goddess, if I have to do one more LOVELESS analysis, I'm actually going to run away and become a hobo in the woods," groaned Jackson as we filtered out of the schoolhouse.

Alice kicked a pebble in her path, her mouth drawn in a thin line vaguely reminiscent of her ma. "You probably wouldn't miss much," she said.

I glanced at her as we followed the crowd of children down the path towards the town square. I didn't miss the clear resentment in her voice. "What are you talking about, Alice?"

"Nothing," she replied.

We stopped in square, where the road abruptly split into four, one of which traveled past the mako reactor and out of town towards Gold Saucer. Jackson paused and eyed this one for a long while. "What's so scary about a mako reactor anyways?"

"Everything," I said, elbowing him in the side. "Don't go near that thing, you hear me?"

"Aye, sir," he said, saluting mockingly.

I lunged to elbow him again, but he ducked out of the way, twirling around to tap on my shoulder. Alice caught me by the back of my sweatshirt and yanked me backwards before I tripped over a pebble. "Careful!" she said as she pulled me back to my feet. "Sometimes I wonder why I even try with you at all."

"Because you love us," cooed Jackson, sweeping us all into a bruising hug. I found myself crushed against his side, Alice's pigtails swaying dangerously close to my face. There was a speck of dirt on the collar of her dress.

"Get off!" groaned Alice. "Otherwise I might actually not love you at all."

"Don't be like that," said Jackson as he released us. "Come on, I'll treat ya to dinner. It's fish stew!"

"It's always fish stew."

"Is not. Ma made Midgardian noodles once." He wrinkled his nose. "Was not good."

Despite her continued protests, Jackson hooked his arm around Alice's neck and began to pull her towards the road that headed towards his house. He glanced over his shoulder. "You coming, Al?"

I didn't move. "Sorry. Stuff to do at home."

Nothing on Jackson's face revealed disappointment. He'd always been good at poker. "Next time, then."

"Yup. Next time."

I waited until they disappeared around the bend of the road. Then I sprinted down the path to my house and practically leaped up the steps to the door. "Ma, I'm home!" I shouted as I passed her figure at the dinner table, her head stooped over a stack of papers.

"Dinner in an hour, Al," she called.

I shouted my assent and then leaped up the stairs, taking two steps at a time. My heart pounded as I veered around the hallway and slipped into my room.

Good. The computer was still on my bed.

I unwrapped its packaging and tossed it aside. Then I lugged it over to my crooked desk, tossed myself on the stool, and plugged it in, waiting with bated breath for it to start up. ShinRa's logo popped up and began to flash.

_Create new_ _account._

_Al Fair,_ I typed without hesitation. It threw up a new message. _Password?_

I paused. Then I inputed the one name that I would never forget.

The computer beeped._ Account created._ I grinned with delight, then logged in, echoing the same steps I'd taken to create it. When I finally arrived at the desktop, a small red icon jumped in the corner of the screen. After a moment of hesitation, I clicked on it.

_Hey, Al! _it read in cheerful print. _Reeve here. How are you liking the computer so far? It's a SRbook Pro. Don't worry about paying me back. Just think of it as a present for helping me at the mako reactor._

_You already know my work ShinRa-mail, but here's my personal one. It's for friends and family only, so k__eep in touch, okay? I want to talk to you about some things._

_Sincerely, Reeve Tuesti_

I smiled at the screen, fingers tapping a furious pattern on the able. I couldn't help but swing my feet and scoot forward as I clicked on ShinRa-mail and began to type.

"_Hey, Reeve._

_Nerd._

_Just kidding. How's life back at ShinRa? __Have you talked to anyone about dismantling the reactor? _

_Now that it's basically useless, I don't want the town contaminated by mako. Super-strength isn't as cool as it sounds, you know. Trying to eat with a fork is hard when you can bend it with two fingers easily..."_


End file.
